Alright, so I'm going to warn any of you reading this that the following is quite emo. As much as I hate to spill my guts online anymore, I've been doing to much of thinking to let it be haltered up and drive me to hell.

First off, I'd like to sincerly apologize to the following people for numerous reasons...

The Band: I am sorry for dogging you all to figure out when the next practice is. I've spent so much time bugging you guys about it, and not attempting to do something about it. You guys are like family to me. As much as I alienate myself from you guys, as much as I make things ackward, you guys mean the world to me. You guys have lots of patience tolerating my whininess and annoyance, and my gratitude is unlimited towards you for it. Quinn..Matt..Corey..Jon..you guys are like brothers to me.

My friends: Again, you guys are like family to me. I am realizing how much of a dick and a total asswipe I am towards you guys these days. You guys don't deserve my shit, you guys are too good for it. Whether it's me being a total asshole about things, being nosey, or dogging you about the whereabouts of someone (that goes out to you Andrew), I am so fucking sorry. If I have ever made you feel sad, angry, or any other negative attitude, you do not understand how sorry I truely am for all of the bullshit I am putting all you guys through.

I am also sorry for alienating myself from most of you guys. The reason I'm so ackward around people anymore is, well, I'm scared. I'm scared of hurting people again. I'm scared of ruining great friendships again. I've hurt too many people in the past to let it happen again.

None of you guys deserve my bullshit, none of you guys do not deserve to be hurt because of my chronic asshole-ness and complaining.

I'm also fucking sorry for being a total downer to everyone. Whenever I talk to people, I always have my problems I dump on them. I shouldn't be so fucking depressed, but that's how I've been, and I'm sorry. I shouldn't be, but I am. I am weak.

There are millions of people in worse cases than I, and yet I am the selfish egotistical son of a bitch who can't crack a fucking smile once in awhile.

I want to be happy again, I want to not have so many negative thoughts stuck in my head. I can't get them out, I can't just drop them. Forgetting is not an easy task for someone of my emotional and mental quiver.

Am I asking pity with all my depressing notions? No, of course not. I never ask for pity. What I am guilty of is throwing my shit on people in desperate hopes of seeking some form of help. Definition? Complaining. And recently, I've just come to the conclusion that other people don't need to help me with my mental problems. I need to be a fucking man once in my fucking life and work my own shit out. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of being such a negative person to everyone. I'm trying to get better, and of course I'm falling down. But the fact of the matter is, I'm trying. As of today, I am working on all these things myself.

As Kele put it: "Quit complaining. You're complaining now. Just shut up."

So that is what I am going to do. I am going to shut up.

I'm done with this, I'm done with instant messenger, I'm done with putting my shit online. I'm going to get a new name, and only add the people I need to talk to. The only difference is, I won't try and talk to them about MY problems anymore.

So, goodbye.

Count me officially shut up'd.

His name? The Hudge

His alligator puppet? Philly Cheese Steak

Location? Montreal

Who is he? The worlds most awesome homeless man.

His story? We were sitting in the shade cooling off and just watching the crowd wander. And then from behind, he came. He was yelling incoherantly in french at his alligator puppet or anyone near him. He was a large man, with a heart of gold...well...ok..not gold. But none the less, he is amazing.

It's hard to see the puppet in the pictures, but if you look REAAAAAAL close at his hand in the first one, you can make it out.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

In other news, this also is amazing:

<WiLdSeXyPrInCeSs> i luv guyz where would they be wifout us gals???
<XeNoX> Still in the Garden Of Eden you gullible bitch.
-------------------------------------------------------
<NOhope> fuckign maerican
<NOhope> die in twin tower fat hamburger
-------------------------------------------------------
<wig> Seriously... .45k/sec it is a joke.. I could have just gone out and taken my own photos of children in this time
-------------------------------------------------------
<Supra87T> now i have to get tested for aids.
<Snipa> Think positive
<Supra87T> fuck you man, thats not even funny
------------------------------------------------------
 i wonder if kids will ever learn about e-history
 Internet History 101: Hamster Dance through Mahir. Special Seminar: All Your Base, and how it are Belong to Us

- Taken from numerous funny sayings on numerous Counter Strike servers. *Snort*

Currently Listening As the Palaces Burn By Lamb of God see related

And so, today is my last day in Ohio until the 29th. Starting tommarow, I'm heading to the great white north that is french canada to mingle among the oodles of donuts and hairy women.

Until then, I shall leave you with a teaser for the Ian and Quinn untitled sextape:

Coming to a theatre near you.

Speaking of that show, it was quite fun. Not a lot of people, but still fun playing with our friends in Count the Days. Whenever we play shows with them, something amazing happens.

So until the 29th, I bid you a goodbye. I expect to see some presents in the comment box upon my return!

Oh, and be sure to watch out for the new demo we'll be recording soon, and the oodles and oodles of shows we'll be playing in mid-july and on.

I shall see you all soon..

Currently Playing Shadows Are Security By As I Lay Dying see related

- The Darkest Nights -

A brief review of what is going on thus far:

- The band is taking a break from shows for a bit for a huge writing break to create and record new material.

- I'm falling for someone; how unmetal of me.

- I have many characteristic flaws still in need of major work; how emo of me.

I'm also in works with a new GP4 bass project. I'm starting to spark ideas for some songs, we'll see how it goes.

But in the mean time, I shall not bore you with my love life and emo situations. So until next time something interesting happens, you're stuck at listening to "Ruin" on repeat.

Muaha.

Quintessential rocking out-ness

Quinn and his amazing red hair

I think me and Brad have similar bass faces. Look at this one, and look at this next one:

Yeah, look at the fucking bass face. How metal is that? I think he copied off me or something.

Me rocking out, and Corey eating the microphone like Oprah Winfrey on a T-Bone steak.

This is when I broke my A string, and I was incredibly pissed.

Matt's post ejaculation face, and me going insane in the background.

"LOOK WHAT METAL DOES TO BASS GUITARS!"

"Ok, 1...2..oh wait Ian *Click*"

And I refrain from posting the last picture of me, for the fact that I look like Brian Peppers with a perm.

Thas'it for now.